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ADHD perfectionism and its close cousin all-or-nothing thinking run prevalent in ADHD-ers. In today’s episode I talk about my favorite strategy: aim for an 80% success rate when you set goals, baking in a 20% margin of error (because: life). I first got this idea from Hungry Girl and have been applying it in all sorts of ways including diet, work, budget, and home/parenting.
Food – I’m an intermittent faster, but I aim for 6 days a week rather than the perfect 7. And if I’m being honest I’m not there yet and I’m okay with that. This can also work with exercise and water drinking goals. Take your ideal and slash 20% – that’s your new goal. Still want to aim for the stars? Make the ideal your stretch goal.
Work – We weren’t meant to be robots 8 hours a day. Most companies understand the idea that there’s a ramp-up period of emails, and a ramp-down period of closing out for the day. Get away from the idea that you need to be pushing your petal to the metal the entire time and for god sake take your breaks. This may seem counter-intuitive, but it’s much better than crashing and burning because you fried your brain right out of the gate.
Budget – Healthy budget habits like avoiding to eat out are fantastic. But build in 20% for the unexpected. You can even have a separate budget for the unexpected. You Need A Budget is a great tool for this, where you can create a bucket, Rainy Day, for example.
The point is, just like your diet and work day, you’re not going to be perfect 24/7. To plan for success by building in those imperfect times and limiting it to 20%.
Home/Parenting – Aim for 80% of the time doing what’s reasonable. Not what’s on a Pinterest board, but what a reasonable person would expect. For example, the way we divide chores at my house, I’m in charge of packing lunches and cooking dinner.
Reasonable Sarah does this most days of the week. But people get sick. People occasionally stay up too late watching Netflix. It’s okay! We’re not robots.
Give yourself the grace of 20% (for me, this is typically Saturdays) and move on!
How do you fight perfectionism or all-or-nothing thinking? Email me at contact at adultingwithadhd dot com. Also email me questions, and let me know what you want to hear me talk about.
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